chapter 8: the final war

Yeah.. shall we go downstairs and continue our conversation with a coffee?

He was waiting for my reply. I wish he had asked me after some OS, or DS class, at least I would have said “no” nicely.

But some how.. i said “no.. i got to go.. bye” and ran from there...

Divya was escalated, excited, cheered up, exuberant, and I don’t know wat! after hearing the news a boy asked me for coffee... she was behaving as if she was invited for the coffee.. That too by Hritik Roshan...

“wow, thats not possible, did he really ask U for coffee???”

“what do u think i told u divya?”

“ya.. but seriously??? First one right???”

“shut up, i am already bugged, he gives me big smile all day, tries to talk me all time, i keep running, n its fun for u”

“yaar.. why r u over reacting so much, have a coffee na, kya jayega?”

“yaar.. its not about coffee, i can’t smile like u all day and talk nicely, more over don’t want to hurt him either”

“hmm.. hey how does he look haan?” she had started teasing me now.

“yaar.. chup na...”

“ok ok” she smiled again. “let’s go for a coffee??” she winked.

I threw at her the first thing that my hand reached...

Classes were going on at the rate never before. It demanded more energy, stamina, and for me more food. But i was bugged up totally with hostel food. Just same daal, rice, everyday. I was missing home, mom made food. I did bring loads of parcels for me, like kurkure, lays, biscuits, wafers, chocolates but my stocks never lasted long. We also had an illegal immersion rod in our room, and often made coffee, Maggie, tea etc. but i was fed up. Only good thing about here was my block. My friends. Miss beautiful koel, barnali, tani, divya, sam, kalpana, and few more. We had started hanging out now.

We would go out shopping; we would go out to newer food stores, hotels, pani puri stalls, chat stalls, cake shops in and around and try out new things. Our favourite place was bengoli mithaiwala. It was a big sweets shop. I got chance to try out sweets i had never seen before. Our academy was at one of the center places of Hyderabad. We had anything and everything we wanted in and around us, all enough to get us out of track from GATE-2011, especially for food lovers like me.

I enjoyed a lot with my new best friends. Going out was a routine now. But once i was back to my room i felt terribly bad. I was there to study. But I was doing everything apart from studies. I caught whatever I could from my classes. Xeroxed all notes. but I was nowhere close to anyone else in class. Everyone was worried that they were not studying enough even after hours of studies, that they had doubts, that they needed more materials to solve. Why I was even there I didn’t know. Another month passed. People around me were getting tensed and I was getting relaxed for bad.

Kartik had stopped talking to me now. Even he was fed up of me. But still he gave big smile whenever we met. I always returned it back. Class was like second hostel now. There were friends. People had got into relationships. Class room number 308 was best place in Hyderabad now for most of us.

It was a data structure class. I had dozed off on the first bench that day. N sir asked me- Please open ur eyes. i heard someone waking me. some distant voice. But I was not sure. So I didn’t get up. Rashmi hit me hard n I woke up suddenly. Sir was staring at me. That meant something very bad was coming. I anyway never understood his jokes. But now it was going to be on me. Why did I sleep?

To my surprise sir didn’t comment like he did to that boy that day. He asked me to answer the question on board. I looked at the board. Definitely it was not the topic that was going on when I fell for sleep. There was some tree drawn there.

“Er.. What is the question sir?” i asked slowly.

Sir was angry. But I honestly didn’t know the question. Sir repeated the question for me.

Now it was my turn to answer. “Jai Vivekananda” I concentrated. Er.. i didn’t know the answer. Sir was in no mood of joke. He had already made a favour by not making fool of me in the class. Expecting him to forgive me if I answered wrong was too much of expectation from my side.

“Well, I have just explained this concept two minutes ago. Tell me the answer now.”

Suddenly somehow, I don’t know how, the answer struck to my mind. I suddenly remembered that class of trees taught to us ages ago during my college time. I somehow told the correct answer.

It was a correct answer. I was waiting for sir to respond now.

“u were sleeping or u listen to class eyes closed?”

“Sir i was listening...”

“or U were meditating?”

“Er.. no sir.. i was listening.”

Sir was really angry now. he knew i wasn’t listening. “Better don’t sleep on first bench from next time.”

Sir carried on.

And i was saved. Somehow... I don’t know... thank god.

My respect in class got doubled that day... people hardly noticed me before. Rather ignored me, as they had always seen me sleeping. But now I was enjoying some attention... ;) he he.. now i really wanted to study... things changed after that day.. People came to me to discuss things. I was no way ready to let my image go down. I started studying. At least I controlled my sleep little more.

Another month passed. And it was mid November now. GATE exam was just 3 months away. And if i looked back I found I was nowhere close to even 10 percent of others. I didn’t know many concepts yet, in many subjects, materials were pending. The piles of Xeroxes were increasing. All those scared me badly. I was not able to study in hostel; I had missed many lectures from beginning either by getting up late or by dozing off. Whenever I touched one subject, other subjects haunted me. And in three months, it was just not going to happen. I was not even going to qualify. And finally one day I gave up. And just after a week, on December the third, they said- “Course is over... u have two months to revise all this... Revise thoroughly... and all the best...!”

where was i? At the start of the ladder.. wat i knew? Nothing. What was i going to do? Sit and cry!!!! 2 Jobs gone, missed coaching... What next? In the mean time I got the confirmatory mail that my forms reached gate office and admit cards shall be sent soon!!!!

I was surrounded by immense pressure I could not handle... I was all alone, and I had no escape either...